“Try not to feel too jealous, hunnie. Your time will come.”
The end of my dad’s voice mail hung in the air as I processed his information. Cousin. Got engaged. In Paris. Ooh la la.
I know I shouldn’t complain about this. My cousin is awesome, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t happy for her. I AM happy for her. I’m also more than slightly jealous of her. When I talked to her this morning she was completely giddy…gushing about her plans for a February wedding and still completely shocked at the recent turn of events. It was so pure and genuine, I was smiling as I read her words.
All this disappointment? It’s not fair to Michael. We had a wonderful weekend together. The kind of weekend that feels like it was created just for us. The kind of weekend–as cheesy as it sounds–that made me catch my breath, take his face in my hands and say “I just love you SO MUCH!” Because if I didn’t say it, it was going to burst out of the top of my head and fly all over the living room.
This weekend we talked about our five year plan. About what the future holds for us. At the top of his list was Get Married. It’s at the top of mine, too.
I know it’s coming. I can see it in his eyes when he kisses me. I can feel it when he brushes the hair off my face, wakes me up from a nap with a kiss, or lets me be the little spoon.
I want to be his little spoon for the rest of my life.
I’m ready.
12 comments
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July 23, 2007 at 10:36 am
kwarterlifecrisis
Aww. Like you and I have talked about before, I get that whole ‘I’m excited for you but umm when’s it my turn’ thing. It’s totally coming soon for you though. Remember my dream?! I’m, like, psychic.
July 23, 2007 at 11:07 am
lauriekendrick
Getting engaged in Paris. Lovely, it really is, but don’t worry about where…worry about what. See, where is only part of the big LOVE EQUATION.
They’ll need to stay married in Long Island.
Endure 2am feedings and sleepless nights with a colicky baby in Philadelphia.
Tonsillitis and emergency surgery in Atlanta.
Abject debt and money woes in Dallas.
Heartache with a prostate cancer scare in Tulsa.
Menopause in Taos.
A separation and possible divorce in Chicago.
Renewing your vows in Vancouver.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that where you get engaged is great but it’s where you live your marriage that really matters.
You’ll be fine, Molly. You’ll be able to spoon up all the happiness you want.
Best,
Laurie
July 23, 2007 at 11:18 am
sasharay
Awwwwww… I know exactly how you feel. P has his “plan” too but I am so ready!!
I am gad to hear you had such a great weekend!!!
July 23, 2007 at 12:52 pm
clinkny
I got a bit emotional when I read that. And, I also saw myself around April/May of this year. I was on the verge then; you’re on the verge now.
And I seriously can’t wait for your moment.
July 23, 2007 at 5:01 pm
Anna
HOW CUTE ARE YOU!!
Glad you are so happy, the EVENT will just be the icing on top.
And Michael?
We’re all ready, too.
July 23, 2007 at 6:15 pm
JC
Spoooooonin’ on a Sunday after-noon.
July 23, 2007 at 6:15 pm
DG
Oh you are SO next. That’s totally exciting although I completely understand how you are happy for but jealous of at the same time…
July 23, 2007 at 7:04 pm
crystall
Am I the only one who read this and got angry at your boyfriend? Like this is all completely his fault even though it’s not? Rational is NOT my thing.
July 23, 2007 at 10:46 pm
katie
Awww. I can’t wait for the day when I check your blog and see the post where you tell everyone about your engagement. I just know it’s going to be an awesome story–you guys are so cute and romantic! Eeeeee!
July 23, 2007 at 11:18 pm
Kateastrophe
So, Matt and I were on a plane home from Vegas . . . we’d been dating for a long time, I had moved to Phoenix for him and he’d finally met my scary dad. We had discussed marriage, we knew it was going to happen, I just knew he takes his sweet ass time to do just about anything . . . so I finally just looked at him and said “I want to get married in May, so can we please just say we’re getting married and pick a date already?” So, in effect, I “proposed” to my husband. On a plane. From Vegas. The real proposal came later, but I knew my husband and I knew that I was going to have to be a lot pushy to get it accomplished
SO, I’m not saying that you should do what I did . . . but . . . sometimes a little shove is necessary! Hahah.
Oh, and to give you another idea at how slooowwww my hubs is . . . he said he loved me for the first time TWO WEEKS before we got engaged. He’d been “waiting for the perfect moment.” And uh . . . apparently the beach in Maui at Sunset hadn’t been it, along with thousands of other moments. So, be grateful he says he loves you already! HAHAh. Just kidding. Sort of.
July 24, 2007 at 12:49 pm
Sass
Please show me a woman in your situation who WOULDN’T be jealous.
And don’t think I haven’t been counting down…I know when those 6 months are up. I know I’m not on the top of your list of ‘people to call when I get engaged’, but can I get a text?
January 8, 2008 at 11:50 am
Meghan
I understand exactly what you went through!!! At this time last year I was in your exact position. Even though my cousin in only 5 months younger than me, the thought of her getting engaged before me made me feel sick to my stomach b/c you know, IM THE OLDEST I GET TO DO EVERYTHING FIRST-WAAAHHH. Well, she ended up getting engaged right after I had that thought, and i DID get sick to my stomach. But alas, my time came only a few short months later. Now we are the maids of honor in each others weddings and we have had a blast planning together!
I hope your time is coming soon, I just started reading your blog a couple weeks ago, and I’m so OCD that I have to read it begining to end. OK, back to reading…