Saturday night we attended a Christmas party for the fire department Michael used to volunteer for in college. I always look forward to the party because it’s a great chance to get together with all the guys I used to hang out with in college and see some of the girlfriends-turned-wives that have become close friends.
I went back and forth with my outfit choice, finally deciding on a red BCBG dress, textured stockings and heels. I thought I looked pretty good.
We were a little early to the party, so I had a good view on the front door during cocktail hour. And as the current group of college-aged firemen started coming in the door with their dates, my mouth hit the floor.
Their outfits were borderline obscene. All of them! I have never seen so many girls teetering around in skinny heels with the bottom of their dresses barely covering their butt cheeks. I swear, if someone dropped a fork it would have been a serious Britney situation.
After I picked my mouth up off the floor, I turned to gossip about it with my friend. Except she was already sitting at the bar talking to another wife about babies. My friend–a mother of two–and this woman–a soon-to-be mother of two–had found their common bond and were talking a mile a minute.
I turned back to look at the group of girls. “How nice of you to hop off the pole for a few hours and join us,” I thought, followed by “oh my god are you old enough to be here?”
Clearly I could not discuss this with the guys I was standing with, as they saw nothing wrong with it.
This is how the entire cocktail hour went. Me standing next to Michael making small talk with people, all while feeling really stuck in the middle. Not yet a mommy, but not a ho either.
I think this is a weird age. I turn 25 in 28 days. (Yes, New Year’s Eve.) I’m pretty sure I already had my quarter life crisis about two years ago so I’m not freaking out, just thinking about huge differences just a few years make.
Three years ago I would have been one of the girls in the tiny skirts (OK, well not that tiny,) and three years from now I could be a mom.
Crazy.
40 comments
Comments feed for this article
December 3, 2007 at 10:31 am
Sassafras
Ahhh…what a tough spot to be in. But seriously, why have skirt/short lengths gotten so tiny? I had to turn my head super quick at the gym yesterday because a girl’s shorts were barely covering her butt and I was embarassed. For her.
December 3, 2007 at 10:46 am
alishan
I get it. All too well. I faced a similar dillema while l, at Bloomies looking for a dress to wear on New Years Eve. There was a whole lot of “No way. I am entirely too old to wear this!” being said. I’m 26 on the 28th. Not old at all but 22yr olds these days definitely know how to make me feel like the old lady in the room.
Your outfit sounds cute by the way!
December 3, 2007 at 10:50 am
DevilsHeaven
Yeah, I know how you feel. And I’m even older than you. Sometimes I think, OMG, I sound like my mother! But seriously there comes a certain time in your life when you go from the thought process of “IF you’ve got it, FLAUNT IT.” to “I don’t want to be mistaken for a hooker.” Wait until you have those babies, and try to buy them clothes. I am HORRIFIED whenever I go shopping for my tween nieces. Mini-hooker clothes, I swear!
December 3, 2007 at 10:51 am
Peter DeWolf
Molly… don’t be so judgmental.
These women are clearly just looking out for the sweatshop workers who make the dresses. Shorter dresses = less stitching = longer before the workers go blind.
Humanitarians is what they are.
December 3, 2007 at 10:58 am
Elle
Happy first day at your new job! I hope it is wonderful
December 3, 2007 at 11:03 am
Cecile
I can really relate to this post. Because I really was a flirting, drinking, suggestive dancing girl three years ago. And I could be married in three years, having a child in maybe five years. So weird. 25 is the strangest age.
December 3, 2007 at 11:04 am
alishan
My computer farted as I was trying to post. so here we go again…
I definitely know how you feel. I experienced the same thing at Bloomingdales yesterday while trying to find a dress for NYE. There was a lot of internal conversations around how I am entirely too fucking old to wear garments a, b, and c. I’m 26 on the 28th. Not old at all. But leggy 22 yr olds sure do have a way of making me feel like the old lady in the room.
December 3, 2007 at 11:06 am
pie
My computer farted as I was trying to post. so here we go again…
I definitely know how you feel. I experienced the same thing at Bloomingdales yesterday while trying to find a dress for NYE. There was a lot of internal conversations around how I am entirely too fucking old to wear garments a, b, and c. I’m 26 on the 28th. Not old at all. But leggy 22 yr olds sure do have a way of making me feel like the old lady in the room.
Your outfit sounds adorable by the way!
December 3, 2007 at 11:07 am
bloggingbarbie
lol…oh honey…you should have seen some of the dresses I saw Fri night…but then again, mine was kinda short too…which you saw my legs and commented on in my pics.
but i hope i wasn’t ho-ish. i’m more of a classy short girl.
anyway…stuck in the middle pretty much sums it up. but i bet you looked gorgeous. and really, that put you in a category by yourself…above and beyond the rest
oh, and peter’s comment? laughing. out loud. at my computer.
heart you. xo
December 3, 2007 at 11:10 am
Miriam D
I always think its better to class it up and cover up. Then again if I wore a dress that only went to just below my butt, I’d be walking around thinking about it all the time and being really self-conscious. So I could never pull that off.
December 3, 2007 at 11:10 am
La
I know exactly how you feel. Up until a month ago, when I got hit with the “MUST HAVE BABIES” stick all of the sudden, I was so where you are. I couldn’t relate with the people who were single, yet was not even remotely interested in hearing about couples and their babies.
I hope you have a wonderful first day - I missed you on Friday!
December 3, 2007 at 11:11 am
michelle
i know exactly what kind of girls you’re talking about. and i thank god i’m not one of them, too. but i know what it’s like to feel in a weird stage of life. i’m not yet married or a mother but i’m not a bar-hopping ho either. but i sort of like it this way. maybe. a little.
December 3, 2007 at 11:13 am
littlespoon
It’s weird isn’t it? Being in the middle? It’s like junior high all over again!
December 3, 2007 at 11:26 am
gibsondog
Can I tell you how much I relate to this post? VERY much so.
I’m kind of a snot about it though - partly because I envy the youth. I can’t remember when I crossed line from little hot one to classy little wifee? On the other hand, the respect one gets from class is quite nice.
So basically, I’d be there gasping all night too.
PS - My birthday is two days after Christmas - Two years closer to the big 30. I’m terrified.
December 3, 2007 at 11:41 am
Each
in sydney we went to a show where i was positive my skirt was too short, a bit unstable when my MOTHER told me i was being stupid and it was fine.
and yeah i feel you, my birthday is today
December 3, 2007 at 11:41 am
Stephanie
I am with you. My sister, who is 6 years older, offered to save some of her baby things this weekend. I think my husband and I started to seize at the thoughts of the baby stuff being saved for us.
December 3, 2007 at 11:42 am
Katie
I often feel like I’m in the same sort of limbo. I got married at 24 and still had a “youngish” mindset but I didn’t really belong there or with the “mommy” mindset either. And now, at 26, I’m still in the middle. Luckily more of my firends have gotten into serious relationships now so I have more people to commiserate with
December 3, 2007 at 11:48 am
kwarterlifecrisis
I often feel the same way. I’m not a hoooooooo, not yet a moooooooom. (You mentioned Britney and now that’s all I can think of.)
Hope the new job is going well.
December 3, 2007 at 11:52 am
Amanda Brown
I feel ya. I’m 25 too and it’s a strange age because dressing like a 30 year old sometimes feels like dress up, but I’ve got too much cottage cheese on my thighs to dress like an 18 year old anymore.
December 3, 2007 at 12:22 pm
mikesgotnothin
Was there huge BOD — or, as I coined at my college reunion weekend — boobs on display. These kids today. It kills me!
December 3, 2007 at 12:33 pm
Anna
And Mike, you have a daughter—hopefully the “cover up” trend will come around when she is of the BOD age.
I hear you Molly–even after we were married, I felt pretty out of sync with a lot of my reproducing friends, because it just wasn’t something I was ready for—I waited til I was 32 when I had Will. But all these micro cycles are so funny to see, in retrospect and even from where I am now.
For example, it seems like now, when most of my peers who intend to have children either have them or are working on it, then you are more in synch with those who have children your age, or gender or have more than one child, etc. To me right now, the people with JUST one child have about as much in common with me as those girls in short skirts, because our lives are SO different. Strange how that all works, hmm?
As the world turns, I guess.
December 3, 2007 at 12:36 pm
Stephanie
I am turning 24 the 29th of this month and I’m not even halfway to thirty but I’m already freaking out about it. I think I am sort of mature for my age, so when I see 20 year olds running around in the thirty degree weather wearing little more than lingerie, I seriously want to tell them they’re going to catch cold!
December 3, 2007 at 12:38 pm
Jess
I totally feel you on this stuck in the middle place. And I love it. I loved before and I’m excited about later and being a mom, but this place here where I don’t have to worry about dropping my fork or cleaning up after my kids–it’s a pretty nice place to be.
December 3, 2007 at 12:51 pm
caitlynintherye
I never understand girls like that. I guess I’m at the age where I should have been wearing those things, but I just don’t see a point.
By the way, was the party held at the station? Because there’d be a pole ready and waiting for them…
December 3, 2007 at 1:00 pm
Marriage-101
I’m right there with you. But I feel like Jess - I’m loving this in-between stage.
December 3, 2007 at 1:16 pm
chasingparadise
I know what you mean. While crossing the street today to get to work, I spotted a coworker of mine in a short short white dress. SHORT! WHITE! It’s December. I could practically see through her dress. I was embarrassed for her…and for me having to see it!
December 3, 2007 at 2:35 pm
Lisa
Ummm, I like my skirts short. But somehow I feel that I look classier than the aforementioned pole girls… right?
December 3, 2007 at 2:38 pm
Valerie
I’m loving the in-between stage.
December 3, 2007 at 2:49 pm
QueenBee
Mommy Molly blog? TOTALLY looking forward.
I kind of feel stuck in …not really the middle, but somewhere. So, I completely understand. I would’ve gossiped with you. Does that make it better?
December 3, 2007 at 2:59 pm
Kari
I felt the same way this weekend. We went to a bar that is close to the huge campus here in Cbus. It’s not really a bar for the freshman crowd, but more for the graduate students. As I sat there in my hooded sweatshirt, warm jacket, and hat I marveled at the lack of clothing all around me. These people are graduate students and they’re all hooch-ied up. I felt sorry for them that they felt the only way to snag a guy was to be half naked!
December 3, 2007 at 3:03 pm
dreamgrrl
oh MAN — are people already asking you when youre going to have kids? Prettyyy much as soon as we got engaged it was the “so… where do you see yourself in a few years? kids? when???” like - AHHHHHHH let us enjoy US for a bit! terrifying at the moment!
December 3, 2007 at 3:25 pm
Jack
NYE? That’s my birthday too! High five!
December 3, 2007 at 3:59 pm
DG
Ugh I feel like that all the time too! Where are all the girls just like us?
December 3, 2007 at 4:36 pm
Clink
The in-between stage is kind of fun. As was the ho stage (though, really, skirts that could pass for napkins = crossing the line). I’m hoping the mom stage will be fun too.
December 3, 2007 at 6:34 pm
Amanda
I’ve been 25 for the past 11 months or so and I think the whole mid 20s stage can be characterised by this post.
Just stick to being who you are - minus the skimpy teetering Paris wannabes. I don’t like them either
December 3, 2007 at 6:57 pm
L B
I don’t think you are stuck in the middle of anything!!! you are classy and fabulous and your outfit (b/c i can imagine it) was perfect, sexy and extremely fashionable). I know what its like to be surrounded by all of those tiny skirts and I am their age—i wish you could have seen my outfit this saturday night—black opaque tights, a black and gray striped thin sweater jumper (it was short, but I had on OPAQUE tights remember!) and a black turtle neck OH! and the cutest black suede booties you have ever seen….thought you might enjoy the outfit! haha
December 3, 2007 at 11:35 pm
brookem
I was having a conversation about this topic with my girlfriends the other night at the bar. Granted, we were at a more college-y type place than normal, but damn… I just hope I never looked like some of them.
Hope your first week at the new gig is going well!
December 4, 2007 at 1:52 am
tia
i can totally relate to stuck in the middle.
not mommy, but not slutty, and married. we’re a dying breed because pretty soon we change into mommies and then can’t relate to newly married/engaged people who’ve toned their lifestyles down a little, but not to kiddie speed.
i just try to think that we have the best of both worlds. we don’t have the responsibility of kids yet, but if we go to a party and end up in the toilet at home, we know our guys will still be there in the moring.
and there’s also the plus of not catching as many colds, cuz, you know, your ass is actually covered when out at night.
December 4, 2007 at 2:18 am
Sinjin
This whole post sucks because of just one reason — there’s no head to toe picture of you in the outfit you wore to demonstrate what beautiful is compared to those other women.
December 4, 2007 at 11:27 pm
Margarita
Eh, you’re right. It’s a weird age. One I’m also currently in. You don’t dress the skanky way you used to because hello, it’s obvs skanky but you’re still not like “old,” sorry I think mommies are old. I’m sure you looked fab without looking ho-ish. It’s a fine line.