Cancer.
It’s just a terrible word, isn’t it? It’s one of those words that you spit out like gritty sand from an unwashed piece of celery. Or one that you only refer to in hushed whispers. “He’s got cancer.” It becomes tangible. Something you can touch, scrape, throw with force against a wall and kick.
I hate the word cancer.
And I’m tired of it bothering the people I love.
First my grandmother.
Then my other grandmother.
Then my mom.
Then Michael’s dad.
Now the father of my oldest friend.
Every time I hear about it affecting someone else I get enraged. Why? Why them? Why now?
I hate that people die from it.
I hate that people lose pieces of themselves to it.
I hate that it’s a reality that we cannot escape.
My sister and I will have to begin getting mammograms in our early 30s.
Michael will have to be screened at a young age too.
And my friend will have to sit by her father as he goes through chemotherapy.
At least Cancer doesn’t try to hide behind it’s name. It’s not going around as “Pillow” or “Kitten” and trying to fool us all.
Cancer is out there. Loud and clear.
And I’m really pissed off about that.
27 comments
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July 17, 2008 at 12:55 pm
JenBun
It is a horrible word for a horrible disease.
Love and hope to your friend and her family…
♥
July 17, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Jennie
I hate it, too. I wish so MUCH for a cure to wipe it all away. So sorry for your friend’s family.
July 17, 2008 at 1:08 pm
Sylvia
In agreement with you. I try and combat my hate with fundraising and activities to help people fighting it.
It sort of helps.
July 17, 2008 at 1:33 pm
Dani
The sad part is w/ all of our technology and advancements in science we are still so far from finding a cure for all cancers. Even w/ chemotherapy and other treatments, the cancer can still come back. It is so upsetting that so many people seem to get it. I too will have to be screened early.
July 17, 2008 at 1:35 pm
kristin
AMEN.
July 17, 2008 at 2:08 pm
DevilsHeaven
Amen sister.
July 17, 2008 at 2:10 pm
bing
So sorry to hear that cancer keeps affecting the people in your life. It is a truly horrible and evil disease.
July 17, 2008 at 2:13 pm
Jessica
Such a horrible situation to be in – - – seeing so many people you love being hurt =(. I’m so sorry to hear about the father of your friend.
Cancer is becoming way too common – it’s devastating!
July 17, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Casey
Amen. My baby brother was diagnosed in October and it has permanently changed my life. I hate cancer with every bone in my body.
July 17, 2008 at 2:37 pm
Sassafras
I have been lucky that it hasn’t really affected those around me but it is shocking how many people is has. Like, really. Can’t we do anything?
July 17, 2008 at 3:03 pm
The Renaissance Man
Cancer is a brutal burden to bear. I for one will be running the Relay for Life tommorow. Anyone going to join me?
July 17, 2008 at 3:59 pm
Jessica Lynn
My thoughts and prayers are with your friend, her father, and their entire family.
July 17, 2008 at 4:52 pm
Sara
No one should ever have to battle such a ruthless disease. I am sorry the big C is impacting the ones you love.
July 17, 2008 at 7:36 pm
Janice
DITTO! Cancer effin sucks.
July 17, 2008 at 7:39 pm
maddy
Miss Molly, if you have a family history you should be getting mamograms before you’re 30. The risk get worse as you age, but it’s not worth any risk.
My sister’s best friend was only 27… and there are many even less fortunate. Don’t wait!
xxx
July 17, 2008 at 8:17 pm
Rachel
It is horrible, and I can relate – my grandmother is going through it now, and my grandfather has in the past and now just had part of his thyroid removed in suspicion. I also will be screened early for colon cancer.
It’s a scary world that we’ve screwed up with a lot of crap in it. I’ll add the cancer in your family to my prayer list.
July 17, 2008 at 8:20 pm
Rachel
And by “we’ve screwed up” I am in no way implying it is anyone’s fault that we have cancer in the world or in your family. I just mean the toxins, the sickness, the diseases, etc…. well and it goes back to my religious beliefs about the fall and free will,
but that is a wayyyyy different topic and not appropriate to be addressed here
realized after i posted it it sounded harsh and not what i implied.
Anyway, prayers and thoughts with you.
July 18, 2008 at 1:18 am
christine
Wow, I was thinking about writing a cancer post this week, too. In addition to a 30-something girlfriend fighting cancer for the SECOND time and a 40-something girlfriend doing the same, I also found out last week that a 28-year-old friend from college died in February b/c of cancer. Then a family member died last week. Cancer. Yesterday I got a phone call from my dad – his brother has cancer, and the test results don’t look promising.
If I could, I would use every self-defense trick my military husband has taught me to kick the living crap out of cancer. Then, when it would lie helpless on the floor, I’d kick it some more. Right where it counts. Damn cancer. I hate cancer.
July 18, 2008 at 4:11 am
Janet
Im a doctor – and I hate cancer too! Have seen lots and lots of people battling with it every day and know how hard it is to go through for both the sufferers and their loved ones. However, I just wanted to point out something from a ‘medical’ point of view – As Im sure you all know ‘cancer’ is a very generic term – bit like saying “infection” – can mean so many different things – eg from cancer of the prostate or of the breast or of the skin – all of these conditions carry wildly different prognoses (some very good, some awful) – and even within each type some are much more severe than others. Of course ALWAYS it is a scary and confronting experience for the individual person going through with it.
I am working in India at the moment (and am here for a few years) – am doing work and research for people with HIV and tuberculosis and my fiance (also a doctor) is working for children who are malnourished and severely anaemic. We are seeing 20 year olds, 2 year olds dying every day of things which are completely treatable – like diarrhoea, malnutrition, HIV – things where we DO have treatments and cures. Deaths which are entirely unnecessary, but occur in the millions simply because of poverty. I cannot describe how horrible it is to watch a five year old die of something you know you could fix quite easily – if only you were working in a country that had the resources to deal with it.
I truly do NOT want to diminish the experience of cancer sufferers by saying the above – I know first hand how hard it is, it has also affected many of the people that I love too. I just wanted to remind everyone that in fact, those of us living in the first world are really so incredibly lucky. Of course things are not perfect. We do not have a ‘cure for cancer’ – but we have come an extraordinarily long way in treating many different cancers – and a few are indeed ‘cureable; or at least imminently treatable – the key thing is that we are able to GET those treatments. Part of the reason, why most of us have had cancer be the illness that affects our lives – making us feel that it is so common – is because we are actually all so healthy – we are not dying from illnessess like tuberculosis because we dont have to live 6 to a room in non ventilated mud huts, or diarrhoea because we dont have clean water.
I know this must sound terribly “preachy” and I really dont mean it too – I just had to say something after reading this (fantastic) post after coming home from work where I had to watch four of my patients die needlessly. I know how painful cancer is for so many of us – the pain of illness and death is terrible for everyone – no matter what the cause – but the anger and pain is thousands more intense when such cruel injustice comes into the picture.
July 18, 2008 at 6:14 am
emmaenlighted
God. Your post hit the spot. These past three days have been full of cancer for me. And all I can do really is stand by and pray.
July 18, 2008 at 8:13 am
Princess Taj
What I hate most about cancer, and what most people don’t know about cancer, is that cancer isn’t a foreign infection like a virus or a bacteria. Cancer is our own cells, that for whatever reason, have started to multiply and grow out of control. In a sense, it’s our own body raging a war on it’s self. It’s the ultimate betrayal.
You are in my prayers – love ya girl
July 18, 2008 at 11:11 am
A Lil' Irish Lass
It’s truly horrible and it touches all of us. When I was little, cancer used to be that thing that happened to old people. To other people. Since then, we’ve lost a close family friend at the age of 24. A coworker’s four year old was diagnosed with leukemia. Another close personal friend has been going through such rigorous chemo treatments that I didn’t recognize him when I saw him the other day.
It’s horrific that something like this exists. My thoughts are with you, your friend, and anyone else who’s fallen victim to this terrible disease.
July 18, 2008 at 9:08 pm
Tiffany
I found your blog through 20sb…this is my first visit and you are awesome! I’m dealing with cancer #7 in my family (my grandma); it never gets any easier or less scary does it? This couldn’t have come at a better time for me…it felt like you were in my head when you wrote this post. Thanks. You are definitely in my thoughts.
July 20, 2008 at 12:22 pm
Z
Yes. Which is partly why I chose to do my research in the field… It’s prevalent in my family as well, I’ve already had to remove one “suspicious” freckle from my skin, and I’ve lost too many people that I loved. Someday, I hope, I’ll be able to do something to help someone in this position, however minor my contribution will be. Until then, all I can contribute is my tears and understanding…
July 20, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Danny
amen.
July 21, 2008 at 2:22 pm
caitlynintherye
I had it at 20. My best friend died from leukemia six months before I was diagnosed. It is hell, it always will be. But the support and love that comes from family in friends in that time is the most enduring strength that anyone can ever find. Be there for them.
July 21, 2008 at 11:43 pm
Mike
Fuck cancer. I’m sorry to drop the bomb, but it’s the best way to describe how i feel about it.