I want cake.
It’s the same text message each month. I’ll send it to my friend, or she’ll send it to me. Out of the blue, usually in the evening. Cake. I want it.
Men don’t get these cravings, you know? For the life of him, Michael cannot understand why I will suddenly crave a specific food. It changes…sometimes it’s salty, sometimes it’s sweet. Sometimes it’s cake. (Often, it’s cake.)
I combat these monthly cravings by eating something that is not cake. It’s quite depressing and all the while all I can think about is how great some CAKE would taste right now and if I only had some CAKE I would show it who was boss and eat that CAKE all over the place.
Sure, I could go get a slice of cake somewhere. But I don’t want a slice of cake.
I want the whole cake. And then a slice of cake.
This is not cake.
This is Special K. Special K is not cake.
We had a discussion, Special K and I. I told Special K it was going to cure my cravings and pretend to be cake and we would live happily ever after while losing 1 inch from my waist in 2 weeks. (See that claim? Right there on the bottom left corner of the box? That claim is only true if you eat only Special K and not cake.)
Special K tastes nothing like cake.
Am sad.
And craving cake.
27 comments
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May 28, 2009 at 8:34 am
Paige
I completely understand. My weakness is chips. I try healthy substitutes, but it’s never the same.
May 28, 2009 at 8:56 am
Raz
If you invent cake-flavoured cereal I will be ON IT. My body’s decided it really really wants lots of toast with blackcurrant jam. For the life of me I have no idea what is going on.
You shouldn’t be sad, though, that is an amazing engagement/wedding ring set. Love it.
May 28, 2009 at 9:07 am
Jessica
Molly – you are adorable! Ha ha! Get on that cake-flavored cereal invention!
May 28, 2009 at 9:21 am
Lisa from Seriously.
My husband doesn’t get cravings either. Can’t comprehend craving something at all. Why can’t we be like that?!?!
May 28, 2009 at 9:24 am
Christy
My husband doesn’t understand why I crave cake or chocolate chip cookies. He never craves sugar. But beer, on the other hand… now that’s a different story.
May 28, 2009 at 9:36 am
Peter DeWolf
But your hair looks pretty.
May 28, 2009 at 9:46 am
Britt
Now I want cake. Or chocolate. You can never have too much chocolate. Instead, I’m eating multigrain cheerios. Just can’t do that special K stuff. I’m hungry 5 seconds later.
May 28, 2009 at 10:54 am
juliennejiggs
I’m with Britt – Special K doesn’t fill me up, but it’s okay for snacking! I LOVE multigrain cheerios!
I know there are single serving sizes of Deep and Delicious cake – then you get cake and portion control all in one! (I’d personally just eat the whole thing!)
May 28, 2009 at 11:07 am
Bluebelle
Eating cereal as a snack always makes me feel virtuous. But you’re right. It’s really not the same as cake.
Maybe you could just invent cake that helps you lose an inch from your waist in two weeks? I would buy it. EVERYONE would buy it.
May 28, 2009 at 11:21 am
Elle
I’ve been craving soft serve vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles! I’ve been trying to eat fruit instead to curb the craving…but then I just think these strawberries would be so much better on some soft serve vanilla ice cream.
May 28, 2009 at 11:25 am
heidikins
Kake…it’s Special K Cake. But it’s a fake, like krab.
xox
May 28, 2009 at 11:45 am
each
Special K my ass, unless we mean drugs of course.
That claim only works if you eat cereal twice a day (breakfast and lunch) and nothing else and a tiny supper. Which is not very healthy, I mean protien? Veggies? nope.
That french queen was a big propant of cake…. she let them eat it.
(or starbucks rice crispies, am I right?)
May 28, 2009 at 12:00 pm
Cee
Go to a bar and ask for a birthday cake shot.
Maaaaaagically delicious! And tastes JUST like cake!
May 28, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Me
That kind of Special K is really good though! I eat it every morning!
May 28, 2009 at 12:48 pm
spamwarrior
Awww… I hope you get cake.
May 28, 2009 at 12:49 pm
Sheenah
I gave in to cake this weekend. It was bad.
May 28, 2009 at 2:45 pm
humanbeingblog
Sometimes I say to Steve, “Let’s get DQ!” and he’ll go and get one of those big huge sundaes with a waffle cone bowl and three toppings and a large serving of soft-serve ice cream, and he’ll eat it all on the one-mile drive home, while I’ll have a kids sized vanilla cone that will be half-dripped down my hand from trying to drive and eat it at the same time, and the next day I will not be able to zip up my pants while he will have taken his belt in a notch.
He sucks.
So I get the whole cake/Special K thing. Because I usually end up eating baby carrots or something NOT creamy-cold-delicious when I’m craving, otherwise I’d have to break up with Steve.
May 28, 2009 at 3:45 pm
Barista
I get cake cravings all the time, too. In fact I have one now thanks to this post.
May 28, 2009 at 4:02 pm
Mel
I can see cake cereal becoming a real posiblity. It would be like using the stuff they use in Golden Spoons Fro-Yo for cake batter on some cherrios? and some marshmellows? Makes the milk taste like cake too?
I love me some buffalo wings. I eat celery and ranch and its not the same.
May 28, 2009 at 4:35 pm
DSS
I left you a little something on my blog
May 28, 2009 at 4:58 pm
Shana Leigh
haha, you’re a dork
May 28, 2009 at 7:03 pm
Laura
officially one of my fave posts from you, molly!
May 28, 2009 at 7:59 pm
kim
that reminds me of the time i got up at 5:30 to work out today, then proceeded to have a very healthy breakfast of two eggs and a slice of turkey bacon. Got to work at 7….went directly to the vending machine and chowed down an entire bag of M & Ms.
sometimes, you just need it.
May 28, 2009 at 10:08 pm
Johanna
Would you like to know my “six minute chocolate cake” recipe? It’s yummy, warm chocolate cake, made in the microwave, 4 (good sized) portions, start to finish ~10 minutes.
(We had some tonight!) …and it’s not even that bad for you, really!
May 29, 2009 at 10:50 am
Stephanie
Yes, I crave mint chocolate chip icecream….IMO, the best stuff ever!!!
And a 10 minute microwave cake recipie?! i’d be as big as a house! LOL.
May 29, 2009 at 4:50 pm
Ronnica
I fight my cravings of ice cream by eating ice cream. But that only seems to fuel the cravings…
June 1, 2009 at 11:46 am
rachel
have you ever tried “Chocolatey Delight” ? I find it the most sweet-satisfying of all of them, almost feels like i’m eating something bad while eating it – i bleieve the calorie count/fat is about the same.
I get cake cravings a lot – cake is the bomb.