- The last few days have been spent trying to avoid my husband in our own, small home. He’s been sick. For days! It started off as a Man Cold. You know, the little tickle in the throat that becomes a cough, that becomes THE END OF THE WORLD.

But then, it became the flu. Not even a Man Flu, just an honest to goodness flu that brought with it body aches and a fever. And since freezing rain was pouring from the sky making it impossible to go anywhere, Owen and I hibernated upstairs as far away from him as possible. I’ve been sleeping in the guest room and while he talks to O from afar, he hasn’t picked up his son in days. (He’s really upset about this. It’s sad!)

We’re on Day Three now, and while the fever is gone, the coughing and sneezing and runny nose are in full force. KNOCK ON WOOD, O and I are still healthy, maybe just by luck or maybe by the compulsive hand-washing/orange juice drinking routine I’ve been doing. But as much as I feel badly for Michael, I have to say, a little bit of the Man Cold symptoms are lurking again, and I’m not sure how much longer I can take them.

The moaning after every cough, specifically. I know he’s sick. I feel bad for him, I do! But it’s been three days. Of Man Cold Moaning. And that’s enough.

- Owen, on the other hand, is great. A riot, actually. This week as brought some new discoveries. Specifically, pelvic thrusting. Yes, my little boy is thrusting. Omigod. In reality, he’s just figured out he can arch his back from the reclined-on-pillows position, but holy crap is it hilarious. And he knows it makes me laugh, so he does it even more.

TROUBLE, this one, I tell ya.

And tonight, he also discovered…his parts. Now look, I don’t call them “his parts” in real life, but I’m not about to write the anatomically correct word for “his parts” in a post about my baby. Because ick, I do NOT want to see the search results that would come from that.

Moving on…

The discovery of “his parts” happened on the changing table tonight and guys, he thought it was just about the best thing ever. He looked at me like, “Mama! Did you know this was down here? Like, right here? This thing? A toy! For me? Right here? All the time?’

Boys. They’re a weird breed.

What else? Ah yes, poop. Because we always talk about the poop. The other day he went 36 hours without pooping. I know this can be normal, especially with the addition of solids (he loves those sweet potatoes), but THIRTY SIX HOURS is a long time. I did everything I could to help it along…a little diluted pear juice in his food, yoga moves to promote digestion, taking his temperature rectally. (It’s supposed to trigger the pooping reflex, I swear!) But in the end, I think he just went when he was ready. He didn’t go again today, so it looks like it might be another long stretch…

(I’ll stop talking about poop now.)

- On a totally unrelated topic, I’m think of getting a steam mop. Does anyone have experience with these? Is there one brand that’s better than another? Do they actually work? We have light-colored linoleum in our kitchen that gets gross fast (thanks, Kodiak), and the only thing I’ve really found that works is the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser Mop. But I can’t use that on our hardwoods and I’d like something natural once Owen starts crawling.

- A friend told me tonight he had a very vivid dream (rare for him) that I was pregnant. I’m not, but I sometimes think that I could be (did I just feel nauseous? Am I smelling things more strongly? Why is my nose all runny??) and freak out a little. Not enough that I’ve taken a test or anything, just enough to start flipping out about where we would put another baby and how I just got my body back and how Owen changes so quickly and I just want to keep getting to know him before we become a family of four.

And then I think that if it were to happen sooner than planned, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Challenging, yes, but not impossible.

But the short answer is no: we have no immediate plans to expand our family. We’d like the kids close, but not that close.

- I ate an entire package of Keebler Fudge Sticks in three days. They are delicious; I am disgusting.

- I need to get out of the house tomorrow, before my brain completely turns to mush and I can only ramble on about bodily functions for the next few posts. No one wants that, now do they?

Advertisement