- I finally took the Christmas decor down last week and now it is glaringly obvious that there is nothing hanging on the unpainted walls. My living room is basically a sterile environment. If you don’t count the Cheerio crumbs and dog hair. I started to pin ideas for the room so if you follow me on Pinterest, I apologize for the recent onslaught of photos of mantels and gallery walls. I would also love to paint, but the room is big and neither Michael nor I likes to paint. Hiring someone isn’t in the budget right now so either we suck it up and do it ourselves, or continue to live in the vast whiteness.
- Anyone remember when we watched my mother-in-law’s crazy dog last year? I swore it would not be a repeat thing, and yet, here we are one year later and about to embark on 13 days with Lucy. Last year she was skittish and whiny and afraid of men. Which meant that any time Michael would come into the house…she would pee. And then, to add icing to the cake, she freaked out and expressed her anal glands in my kitchen, and I’ll just take a moment to let that sink in.
Expressed her anal glands. In my kitchen.
That smell is burned in my memory and so help me, if she does it again I am shipping her off to Florida so my MIL an deal with it. So, SO gross.
- Speaking of my MIL, she bought a cow. Not a whole cow, not even half of a cow. She bought something like a fourth of a cow so we could split it between us. Only, we don’t really eat that much red meat. Maybe once or twice a month. She was insistent, however, so now the entire bottom half of my freezer if filled with beef. Because even splitting up a fourth of a cow is still hundreds of pounds of cow. I’m not kidding when I tell you this meat will last us a year, maybe more. There’s just so.much.beef. I’m going to have to host a beef party or something just to put a dent in it.
Except a beef party sounds disgusting. No one would come if I cordially invited them to a beef party. Or they would, but they would think it was an entirely different type of party with a whole different kind of beef, if you catch my drift. And that would be awkward.



8 comments
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January 16, 2013 at 1:00 pm
Swayer
Painting party…show up and paint a bit, then take a meal break for some beef…get your painting done and move some of that meat!
January 16, 2013 at 1:08 pm
Judy
Have your MIL take Lucy to the vet right before she comes to stay. The vet can express the glands so that Lucy won’t have anything with which to befoul your kitchen. My friend has her pit bull expressed a couple of times a year, because yeah. FOUL.
January 16, 2013 at 4:05 pm
Stories from Austin
We have the same problem in our living room. I got pregnant right after we moved into our house and our money has gone elsewhere. It is painted grey, but there is NOTHING on the walls. Now that the tree is down, the emptiness is driving me nuts.
The idea of a beef party is totally hilarious. And yeah..that’s a lot of meat!
January 16, 2013 at 7:14 pm
wife behind TBJ
I have been wanting to have a sausage party bc I LOVE sausage. However, I too, worry about the messaging
January 17, 2013 at 9:03 am
Elle
Oh, Mo. You make me laugh. I would come to your beef party. As your hostess gift I would bring a blueberry candle (I really think it would be needed after all that beef).
January 17, 2013 at 9:47 am
Breanna
PAINT!! Even though painting is no fun – you’ll be done in a week and then you’ll get to enjoy the new color EVERY DAY! So worth it
The painting party is also an amazing idea – have everyone come over and serve chili or tacos or sloppy joes and beer. Beef and painting problems solved!!
January 17, 2013 at 10:56 am
Lisa
I love to paint – but live in FL – sorry! And I never knew a dog could express their own anal glands……um….thanks for the education:)
January 17, 2013 at 5:46 pm
almosthousebroken
to be fair, my husband would love to attend a beef party. not the innuendo kind either, actual cow.
(barf on my shoes)