“Try not to feel too jealous, hunnie. Your time will come.”

The end of my dad’s voice mail hung in the air as I processed his information. Cousin. Got engaged. In Paris. Ooh la la.

I know I shouldn’t complain about this. My cousin is awesome, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t happy for her. I AM happy for her. I’m also more than slightly jealous of her. When I talked to her this morning she was completely giddy…gushing about her plans for a February wedding and still completely shocked at the recent turn of events. It was so pure and genuine, I was smiling as I read her words.

All this disappointment? It’s not fair to Michael. We had a wonderful weekend together. The kind of weekend that feels like it was created just for us. The kind of weekend–as cheesy as it sounds–that made me catch my breath, take his face in my hands and say “I just love you SO MUCH!” Because if I didn’t say it, it was going to burst out of the top of my head and fly all over the living room.

This weekend we talked about our five year plan. About what the future holds for us. At the top of his list was Get Married. It’s at the top of mine, too.

I know it’s coming. I can see it in his eyes when he kisses me. I can feel it when he brushes the hair off my face, wakes me up from a nap with a kiss, or lets me be the little spoon.

I want to be his little spoon for the rest of my life.

I’m ready.