There’s been a lot of secret sharing ’round these parts lately. My girls Ashley and cdp started the trend and I thought I’d join in. It’s cathartic, no? We’re like our own little Post Secret here.
- I’m not religious, but I’ve started to pray. I guess it’s more like thank you’s or wishes, but I do it every night before bed now. It started the day I got engaged. I thanked God, whoever he/she is, for bringing Michael into my life.
- I also pray for my mom. She’s been losing her hearing for years and I’m frustrated that with all this modern medicine, it can’t be reversed. I pray she’ll be able to hear her grandchildren laugh. This prayer always makes me cry.
- And while we’re on the topic, I have very conflicted feelings over this God thing. A woman in my mother’s office died suddenly–at 50–just days before he son’s wedding. Explain that one to me.
- Sometimes when I get overwhelmed, I want to throw in the towel and just elope.
- I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.
- Even though I’m not worried, I always feel a little relieved when I get my period.
- On occasion, I choose comfort over style when I put on shoes for work.
- Sometimes I question my writing ability.
- Sometimes I look in the mirror and think, “Damn, I look good”.
- And sometimes I hate what I see.
- I hate to drive places I don’t know and will make an excuse not to.
- I know I will be a good wife, but I’m scared I won’t be a good mother.
- Even though I know it’s better to save, if I came into some serious money I would buy a pair of Christian Louboutins. In a heartbeat.
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29 comments
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October 18, 2007 at 11:06 am
Jess
I think your secrets are beautiful. Especially in combination.
October 18, 2007 at 11:12 am
libby
ahh that’s so sad about that woman passing away! gosh, i don’t know how i’d even deal. and haha – i have my ‘damn i look good’ moments too!
October 18, 2007 at 11:17 am
cdp
You do look damn good. You’ll be a wonderful mother. You have an incredible writing talent.
I prayed for my mom every night last week while I sat in the ICU and held her hand. And I cried, too.
October 18, 2007 at 11:23 am
kat
I “pray” too!
(glad i’m not the only one who is unsure but still makes wishes)
oh, and it makes me scared to think that i think i will be a good mom but not sure if i would be a good wife…
– not that anyone has asked me to.
October 18, 2007 at 11:28 am
Lisa
When we were planning our wedding, at least once a day I would feel like giving up and eloping. But we had a beautiful wedding, and I’d do it all again if given the chance. (Although being me, I’m sure I’d change a thing or two.)
October 18, 2007 at 11:36 am
Hope
I also hate driving to places I don’t know and I try avoid it as much as possible.
Also, I have only been reading you for a little while now but I think you’ll make a great mother. You’re funny, you’re kind, you’re an awesome sister/daughter/fiance AND you’ve got great taste in shoes, what else do children need anyway? 😉
October 18, 2007 at 11:36 am
La
Oh, I am so madly in love with Christian Louboutin, though that probably comes as no surprise to you. I’d probably do the same. And I’m the same way about driving to unfamiliar places! Everyone makes fun of me, but I always drag the fiance with me. And I think you know I’ve wanted to elope from the very beginning. And that hasn’t changed. 🙂
(None of my secrets seem like actual secrets. Oh well.)
October 18, 2007 at 11:47 am
Courtney
I pray and/or go to church more than people know.
October 18, 2007 at 11:54 am
beingmccrary
What did I read on your blog once? You’re in love with love or something to that effect? That’s all those little babies need! 😉
October 18, 2007 at 12:07 pm
Ashley
it seems like a lot more people have the whole praying/god or no god thing on their list…
it’s nice to know it’s not an uncommon sentiment. to question.
ps – you always look damn good 🙂
October 18, 2007 at 12:23 pm
Lisa
I love this series you guys have all been apart of.
My religiously themed confession is that I never pray anymore. I believe in God, though. Unwaveringly.
October 18, 2007 at 12:23 pm
L B
i’m following you miss molly…here it goes!!!
October 18, 2007 at 12:56 pm
Michelle
like i said on ashley’s post – i *wish* sometimes too. even though i’m unsure about god’s existence.
October 18, 2007 at 2:07 pm
distracted spunk
About your mom’s hearing – I’ve been dealing with it for the last 20 years where I go to bed one night and wake up with less hearing than the night before. I’d be more than happy to talk to you about the options and resources.
And your writing is absolutely beautiful.
October 18, 2007 at 2:24 pm
clinkny
I agree that you have an amazingly beautiful list of secrets.
I tend to pray too. I call it “talking to the universe.” It’s good; it centers me.
And my heart is broken for the family who lost their mother before the son’s wedding. I can’t even imagine. Cannot. Horrible.
October 18, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Jack
I avoid driving to new places too so having moved to a new city and living on my own makes it pretty scary to drive wherever. That’s probably the biggest reason why I don’t own a car right now.
October 18, 2007 at 2:41 pm
DevilsHeaven
We all have our secrects. I’m afaid I’ll be a horrible wife and mother. Even though I love kids and my man, I’ve discovered since F came into my life, I’m horribly selfish.
Get around that one for me.
October 18, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Ashley
You have a great list of secrets and ones a lot of people worry about i’m sure. I’m petrified i’m going to be a horrible mother. I’m just not maternal or domesticated at all! I think every girl is scared about that though. I don’t think you have anything to worry about though 🙂
October 18, 2007 at 3:26 pm
littlespoon
Wow, awesome list. You know, pessimistic did something similar to this on her blog today and it’s making me want to as well. Hmm…
October 18, 2007 at 3:35 pm
kwarterlifecrisis
I’m totally doing this post tomorrow. And ditto on the period thing, by the way. I totally know that I’m not knocked up, but I hold my breath a tiny bit the day I know I’m supposed to get it until it comes.
October 18, 2007 at 3:53 pm
furrychocolates
Molly, I landed here from Laurie Kendrick’s blog. I love your writing style and humor so will remember to check back here.
Good luck with the wedding planning… I got married about a year ago so the work that goes into it is fresh in my mind. The common sense in me knows that I might just lose my mind but the masochistic part of me would do it again in a heartbeat.
Fun times!
October 18, 2007 at 6:44 pm
LMizzle
I work for a religious organization (a nonprofit), but I am unsure about the existence of God!
October 18, 2007 at 8:08 pm
Dirty Little Secrets « I’ll think about that tomorrow.
[…] I’ll blame this on Molly. […]
October 18, 2007 at 9:03 pm
mcgee
i’m 25 and i still don’t know what i want to be when i grow up either.
October 18, 2007 at 9:26 pm
Dani
absolutely wonderful post today.
I actually mailed my postcard secret to frank warren of postsecret…it’s amazing to let something that big off your chest.
October 19, 2007 at 10:17 am
bluesunday
Your secrets are a lot more commonplace than you think! I found myself nodding in agreement when I read most of them.
October 19, 2007 at 4:47 pm
Tina Vaziri
I wish I was brave enough to spill my guts as you guys have. I love your secrets.
October 20, 2007 at 11:57 am
Laurie Kendrick
You’re normal, Molly. Everything you question, wonder about, doubt, ponder..all of that is right on cue for what you’re going through. You have pre-marital stress. You not only worry about the production that is the wedding, but you wonder about the role you must play in your marriage.
Your worries are normal.
And consider yourself fortunate. Many women concern themselves with the ceremony and reception and don’t give their actual marriage a second thought.
In addition to that, you/re an intelligent woman. We all have the same questions.
I’d be surprised if you didn’t..
Buy more shoes….it’s like Xanax.
LK
July 25, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Kate
I think your secrets you shared are in the thoughts of many people out there. It was nice to read that someone else fears some of the same things I do. It’s nice to know you’re never alone.