Sometimes I want to throw in the towel.
This blogging world? Can be mean. Recently, two of my blog friends had nasty comments left on their blog. Unsurprisingly, both were by anonymous commenters who have enough balls to talk crap about someone they don’t know, but are too chicken to use their real name or link to their blog.
I think it’s very courageous of bloggers to put themselves out there. I know I’ve been hesitant in the past to reveal some things, but I’m usually met with such positive feedback by such wonderful readers that it pushes me to keep going.
Occasionally I get the judgemental ones. The people that think they know me because they read my words and are quick to supply a fresh comment daily with some condescending words of “advice” or a rude observation.
I usually brush these people off. Because for every mean reader, there’s 10 amazing ones. But as more and more of my friends get attacked, as people who I thought were friendly readers leave passive aggressive comments, I wonder if blogging is worth it.
It’s easy to say I let it roll right off my back. Because I shouldn’t let these strangers get to me. But the truth is it still stings. To have someone dissect you–to have them decide who you are without really knowing a damn thing about you.
I used to get really excited when I checked Technorati and saw that someone new had linked to me. When I crossed into the triple digits I was shocked. People were reading me and it was awesome.
But when someone un-links you? Now that’s a slap in the face. Especially when it’s someone who used to read you often. I’m not upset with this person because I understand. It’s been the same way for me with her blog. Much like friends can outgrow each other, bloggers can outgrow each other too. I read blogs I feel a connection to and if that’s not there, I probably won’t read much longer.
But I was curious. So I sent her an email saying I think I understood why she no longer reads, but wanted to hear the reason from her. In between her explanation was this:
“I do read your blog from time to time, but not like I did before. Mainly because I can go to Such Great Heights and read the same thing. Somehow, five or six of your blogs have turned into one blog it seems like.”
What do you think, readers? Is this true? Has my own voice disappeared and blended into a big blog mush?
If so, I don’t think I should be doing this anymore.
These Little Moments 
77 comments
Comments feed for this article
November 13, 2007 at 11:59 am
kwarterlifecrisis
I don’t think so at all. And although I’m probably lumped together as one of those five or six, that’s just the opinion of one person so I’m not gonna let it bother me. Yeah, like you said, it still stings, but the primary reason we blog should be for ourselves. Not for whatever meanness a few select people will spew.
November 13, 2007 at 12:07 pm
bluesunday
I don’t think so either. Don’t let one person’s opinion ruin blogging for you. There may be a lot of bloggers who have similar things going on in their lives, but each one has a unique voice. Your approach and interpretation is different from everyone else, and that’s what makes reading you enjoyable.
November 13, 2007 at 12:21 pm
sasharay
I don’t think so at all.
I read you and Clink both but for entirely different reasons.
Keep doing what you’re doing if it is making you happy.
We love you. And yes, we love Clink too… but You’re not Clink and Clink isn’t Molly. Or something.
November 13, 2007 at 12:31 pm
Each
instead of listening to that one person, listen to all the rest of us who can’t wait to get to work and run through the blog roll and comment at every chance we get.
besides dont people always say you know you are famous then trashy magazines start making shit up about you, same for you, you know you are read when shitty people start sayiing shit about you!
just, dont go away, please?
November 13, 2007 at 12:40 pm
Alison
I just started reading your blog and I love it! I just recently started blogging a few months ago, and although I haven’t had negative comments yet, I’m sure they will surface at some point. It’s a double edge sword I guess…but I think you’re doing great, so keep it up! 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 12:41 pm
crystall
That was me who said that. And I don’t think that one comment out of the nine emails is a fair interpretation of the conversation.
I also said: “You are all on the same page, which makes you sound a lot alike. It’s like looking through a baby book of names – all the names are different and have different meanings, but after you read for awhile, they all blur together.”
Anyways, I think we’ve worked everything out – which I’m happy about.
All the best Molly.
crystal
November 13, 2007 at 12:41 pm
elizabethews
I don’t think you should stop. Ever. You are one of the reasons I started to blog and it would be a great disappointment to me and MANY others if you stopped.
And I’m not really sure what she’s saying about 5 or 6 blogs turning into one.
November 13, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Clink
Ugh. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?
Whatever. You’re not going anywhere, I’m not going anywhere and if people think we (and five or six others) are the same person, then they don’t have to read any of us anymore.
I don’t think we’re all the same blog, I think that we write about similar issues. But that’s why we all understand and support each other so well.
I’m not being articulate, mainly because I’m at work and stressed and this totally pissed me off. Feisty Clink in Philadelphia.
November 13, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Peter DeWolf
Screw the jealous jackasses, I say.
November 13, 2007 at 12:45 pm
bloggingbarbie
i heart you.
and molls, you’re unique. we all are. while we do have things in comment, that doesn’t take away from the fact that we are completely different people. yes, our similarities are highlited through blogging, because what else do we have?
my post today goes hand in hand with yours, in light of some recent events I’ve dealt with. Thankyou, for inspiring me to speak out about it, and thankyou, for bringing to light what I know so many other bloggers are feeling.
xo
November 13, 2007 at 12:46 pm
Becky
I agree with everyone else. I read both of you, and I think you both have your own stories to tell and style of writing. Sure, you sometimes write about similar topics, but you have a lot in common – 20 somethings in the working world and planning weddings. It’s understandable that you will cover a similar topic once in a while.
Also, if you leave what are we all supposed to do when we are supposed to be “working.” 😉
November 13, 2007 at 12:47 pm
L B
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
1. All of my blogging people read YOUR blog and love it! In fact this weekend Megan said to me ” I read Molly’s blog all the time, she is an excellent writer and her topics are hilarious and so true” and she doesn’t KNOW you— but she knows me!
2. My roommate thought it was weird that she started to read your blog every time she read mine–but now with her own blog she understands that we all just want to be read—and I assured her that it is not stalking to read blogs, and that you appreciate her readership!
3. I think you are great and I read you everyday—whether I post that day or not!
SO THERE MEAN PEOPLE.
November 13, 2007 at 12:47 pm
legallyheidi
I don’t think you should stop at all! Don’t let other people’s opinions dictate your voice. You have a fabulous blog and fabulous readers and although I’m a relatively new reader, I ❤ your blog!! Write what you want. Don’t let a few petty comments get to you, they’re not worth it 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 12:47 pm
ups and downs; real vs. virtual life. « …more than a blog
[…] wanted to take a minute to call attention to Miss Molls’ blog today. What she posted about is something I feel very strongly about and it truly hit close to home. […]
November 13, 2007 at 12:48 pm
Miriam
Hi Molly-
I’m new to blogging. I just started a week ago. But I’ve been reading your blog for a bit now. I’m terrified/excited to be blogging. I feel like I’m running naked through a public street. And I’ve thought about the few spectators who will point and laugh. But so far, I’m having a really good experience. I’m blogging partly to toughen up, because I can be sensitive to negative judgments of me, and I know there will be people who will say mean things. I hope when the time comes I can just brush it off and say whatever. Anyway, I read both your blog and Clink’s blog. So what if you guys are similar? You’re not exactly the same either. I don’t read your blog because I need something to read. I read because I relate, or because I want to understand, and I’m interested. Does that make sense? Don’t stop writing because of what some other blogger/ anon commentator says. Think of the people like me who’ve been inspired to share their own thoughts!
November 13, 2007 at 12:49 pm
Lisa
Obviously everybody reading is going to think you have a unique voice, right? So the people that stick around, the ones that like you, are really the ones that matter, no? And I sure as heck am sticking around- I think you have a very unique voice! It’s true that you’re similar to other bloggers, but only because you’re going through some of the same stuff. Yeah a whole bunch of people are engaged!
There are some blogs I stop reading after a while because they seem repetitive (of themselves or of others), but not yours!
November 13, 2007 at 1:04 pm
verybadcat
You are not Clink. You are Molly. I like Molly. If she’s engaged, like Clink, and has a career, like Clink, and has ups and downs and likes and dislikes like all the rest of us, great. If you were a pig farmer, I would read your blog. I read because of who you are, not what you do. Well, maybe how well you write.
It could just as easily be said- why read Clink if you read Molly, and it would be just as big of a load of crap. You’re two different people with two different voices and two different perspectives.
If someone is going to feel some redundancy because you and Clink are of similar age and phase, why the hell do they read blogs at all? In the end, age, stage, and voice, we are all just trying to find our way in the world. There’s nothing new about that- people have been living life and pondering it for a long, long time.
F the naysayers. I say stay.
November 13, 2007 at 1:06 pm
The Casual Perfectionist
I think you and Clink (and other 20-something bloggers) are different. Yes, there are common elements to your blogs, but that’s to be expected. When I was a regular on an iCommunity website for expectant mothers, you should have *seen* the trolls that came out of the woodwork. The attacks were *unbelievably* vicious! The trolls win when you get upset. The trolls win when you respond directly to them. I learned a long time ago to not feed the trolls.
That being said, it’s hard to keep yourself protected in a bubble. Things people say will hurt your feelings, and that’s okay. It just means you care.
Don’t stop writing. Don’t worry about “keeping your voice.” Your voice is who you are, and it will shift as things in your life shift.
Keep up the great work. I love reading your blog even though I’m a 30-something, domesticated, married, working-from-home Momma of a toddler. I used to be a lot like you, and I love reading about your life, because it reminds me of the fun times I had in a previous life. Even if you become a 30-something, domesticated, married, Momma, I’ll still be reading because it will be a lot like the fun times I’m still having. 😉
November 13, 2007 at 1:11 pm
La
Molls, that’s crazy. Your voice is unique, and I love reading your blog. I indentify with so much of what you’re going through, and I think that’s why people may think a lot of our blogs are similar. But just because we have similar things going on, and similar interests, we are distinct people, and speaking for myself, i totally heart you and can’t imagine my day without reading your blog! Don’t stop, don’t let stupid people get you down! Listen to us! We love you!
🙂
November 13, 2007 at 1:16 pm
Michelle
Molly you are AWESOME. First of all these “five or six blogs” that were referenced? I’m sure I read them all and I don’t think any of them are redundant. All the blogs I read have their own character that comes out in each post. That’s why I love blogging so much. Everyone has their own story to tell. And don’t ever stop writing! Because I heart you.
xoxo
P.S. – Can I be added to your blogroll? 😉
November 13, 2007 at 1:17 pm
your mom
honestly, i don’t think her comment was such a big deal. if someone stops reading, so what? interests change. your interests change. you could have left it how it was but you had to go ask why she stopped reading. she gave you an answer. so accept that.
you write really well, and i’m not just saying that because. you might not know it, but you actually have a non-posting fan base of people who are well over 20-something and are quite entertained by this blog.
i bet you are just cranky. i think you should go get a soy chai latte and chill out.
by the way, i love your boss. during a few idle moments (at work of course) i followed a few links around and have read his posts both here and elsewhere….and he’s really something special…….
i know you are seriously going to miss him…..
November 13, 2007 at 1:20 pm
Katie
It is hard to keep going some days when there are people who question your words and in essence, you. And yes, it does sting. But please know that you do have a lot of readers out here who enjoy your writing for just what it is: yours. And that’s why we keep coming back 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 1:25 pm
courtney
i’m not sure i’ve commented here before… but i found you on 20somethings a few weeks ago and I’ve been reading ever since. of the new blogs I’ve started reading in the past few months, yours has grown to be one of my favorites. don’t give up because one or two people stop reading or say nasty things–like you said, people grow out of each other, in real life and in blog life. and for every person that you grow out of, hopefully there’s a least one more to step in and take their place.
November 13, 2007 at 1:28 pm
Anna
Your excellent commenting readers have said everything I would say, but just wanted you to know how much I enjoy your blog and the 5 or 6 others. With different voices. So there.
November 13, 2007 at 1:30 pm
mikesgotnothin
Aw shucks, molly’s mom. Thank you for that.
Molly. Don’t stop. Even though you might be doing it, you know, during different hours when, you know, you start that, you know, new job.
And, I’m just guessing here, that I’m clearly not one of the five or six that are meshed together. Although, I gotta tell you, as a now 38-year-old, I think I understand mid 20 something females now better than I ever have.
November 13, 2007 at 1:30 pm
littlespoon
Ok, now I’m worried that I’ve pissed you off in some way. I know I couldn’t possibly have but when people write blogs like this I feel like they’re talking right to me.
And I hate the mean anonymous comments. If you’re going to be mean…at least put your name on it 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 1:31 pm
QueenBee
Oh girl! Do not let this one get to you! You ARE your own voice. The only thing I can see that you can Clink write about in common is weddings, and you each bring your own flavor to it. You’re too good to let this one person bother you. You’re not only your voice, but it’s a beautiful one. (And I swear I’m not trying to sound like a kiss-ass here. 😉 ) You write so beautifully, and so does Clink, but I can’t even believe that she would say that it’s all the same thing.
November 13, 2007 at 1:32 pm
QueenBee
And LS? I completely agree with you! When people write so generally, I feel like they’re talking to me and that I’ve somehow been passive aggressive when I was trying to be silly!
November 13, 2007 at 1:37 pm
erbear
you are great molly and i seriously check your blog probably more than is normal for updates just in case there is SURPRISE! Double post!! : )don’t stop writing…you and clink were my inspiration to start my blog and i can only hope that as i keep writing i will inspire someone too. : ) ❤
November 13, 2007 at 1:38 pm
Fritz
Molly!! i dont know if you really remember me from working at the “port” but i have been reading your blog since i left, got it from mikes, and i love just reading about everyday life in mollys world! youre a great writer and certainly write for the joy of writing, i know its hard to ignore the bad comments, but i will go along with everyone else and say screw em!!! and ignore them!!! and keep up the great blogging for the sake of everyone who really enjoys it!!! Whoo Hoo For MOLLY!!!!
November 13, 2007 at 1:38 pm
dreamgrrl
awww molly it’ll be okay…. like everyone before me has said, you are great, youre writing is unique, and it is not your fault that your “IBFF” and you are so alike that you have smiliar points of view and writing styles. you are both awesome and individual. dont let the man get you down.
also, i saw the comment from “your mom” and thought it was a joke and got a good laugh out of the name 😉
keep your chin up!
November 13, 2007 at 1:44 pm
Anna
I will never understand why people leave negative and mean comments anonymously. I guess I was just taught that if you can’t say something nice you shouldn’t say anything at all. If you’re truly trying to help a person by offering your opinion or advice (even if it is negative) put your name on it!
Saying that all 20-something blogs run together is like saying all of the mommyblogs are the same. While your circumstances may be similar, your take on them will certainly be different.
I’m with your mom – people are fickle. Their interests change. As hard as it is, don’t take it too personally (advice I need to give myself on a daily basis).
November 13, 2007 at 1:48 pm
Sparkel
I’ve lurked on your blog for a while, and read Such Great Heights too, and agree with other commenters who say that you’re similar, but not the same. I love reading both, but also don’t understand the whole “one or the other” mentality as it pertains to anything, so…I say keep writing about YOUR life because obviously a lot of people like to read about it.
Also, not to whine, but I rarely get comments, let alone negative comments, so I’d feel flattered that people like reading enough to comment and to come back every day. Please continue to blog 😀
November 13, 2007 at 1:48 pm
Nicole
Hi Molly!
I found your blog through Clink’s a while ago and have been hooked since! I agree with the others – I love your voice (which is totally unique) and would hate it if you went away. I’ve been lazy in updating our blogroll, but I’m totally going to add you because I read you every day! 🙂
Love,
Nicole
November 13, 2007 at 1:52 pm
Chelle
You are one of my first reads. Not cuz we work together, but cuz I enjoy reading your perspective. And if you stop blogging after you leave us, how will I know what’s up like I know now?
PS: I was actually bummed to be sick the last few days… I know I’m missing the last lunch hour adventures around the office. Can it be true? So gonna miss you, girlie!
😀
November 13, 2007 at 2:19 pm
Barb
Don’t ever change! I love your blog just the way that it is! I can relate to so many things that you talk about… and just because women might have the same issues to write about… that doesn’t mean every one of those women will have a different spin on it!
Viva la opinions!
November 13, 2007 at 2:34 pm
The Lisa Show
DUDE. That’s just wrong. And don’t quit! You can’t possibly believe that, right? Of course there are similarities. You’re both engaged, having the time of your lives, and you’re BFFs. But anyone who really READS your blogs knows you’re still very different people. Don’t let the haters get you down.
November 13, 2007 at 2:35 pm
Hope
You have an extremely distinctive voice and your blog is a pleasure to read. I think the question is whether you still enjoy writing here, if you do–great continue and don’t care what some people may think. You have loyal readers who love you and will always visit you and new readers who will just discover you. I predict you have a long future ahead of you 😉
Gah, anonymous negative comments infuriate me!
November 13, 2007 at 2:48 pm
caitlynintherye
This sort of reminds me of my real-world group of friends. I love them all to death, call them to see how their days are, love to hear their stories. Of course there are some that have similar mannerisms, talk about similar things. But that’s because we all spend so much time together.
In the same sense, you and Clink are close. You both remain absolutely unique, but you have picked up minor mannerisms. And I love that. I like that I put away a portion of my time every day to figure out what’s happening in your lives- I feel like I know you all as well as the girls I go out with.
Don’t let her get you down, don’t let any advice be taken the wrong way. You wouldn’t have this many people writing to tell you that they love to read your writing if you were boring because really, who else would write about Aussie tush?
November 13, 2007 at 2:56 pm
Kari
It’s been said, but I just wanted to say keep blogging 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 3:01 pm
DG
Stop it RIGHT now Molly. You are amazing and whoever this beyotch is has NO idea who she is talking to. So what if some blogs have similar content – hey, we’re in our mid twenties with relationship and job and body issues – it’s gonna happen.
I love you and please please please don’t stop blogging 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 3:07 pm
Butter
Don’t let the post get to you. You are an excellent writer and your blog is always entertaining. I read Clink’s blog too and while you have some things in common – you are very different people and very different writers. I read the blogs of people whom I relate to on one level or another and therefore many of the blogs I read have some similarities (20something, wedding planning, working pressures etc etc.) to say that they are all the same is a ridiculous over generalization.
November 13, 2007 at 3:15 pm
gibsondog
You are fantastic! I just BEGAN reading your blog… (hello. newbie!)
I think your ugly readers are not getting the fact that you …. and Clink… are starting a new page in both of your lives! Being engaged is an AMAZING experience! You should share with the world your excitement!
Friends – I stress the word FRIENDS … are delighted for you. Not ugly angry green haters. You don’t need that in your life! Best to walk away and ROCK ON! Just rock on!
On the bright side, you’ve gained a nice reader! And many more … I’m sure.
Ok. I’m out … vacation time here I come!
November 13, 2007 at 3:39 pm
ash
I read your blog and Clink’s blog, amoung a few others, and think they are great in different ways. I personally would take the comment as a compliment. It is only natural for friends to start to sound and act alike and want to talk about similar things(hello, wedding planning!). It is a positive thing. We gravitate to what we like and what is like us. I started reading Clink’s first and then thought if I like hers then I would probably like yours too and I bet many people have thought the same about finding you and these “5 or 6 others”. I don’t have a blog of my own(I couldn’t handle the negativity either), but I think if I did it would have a similar voice to the blogs I read because that is how I think, what I think about and exactly why I like them.
Bascially, I enjoy your writing and read what I do because it IS similar but everyone still has their unique voice and its what keeps me coming back everyday. Keep it up!
November 13, 2007 at 4:05 pm
Ashley
OK so anything that i could possibly say, has been said. But please please please keep blogging, you are an amazing writer and person! I love reading your blog and obviously you have a ton of fans. 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 5:12 pm
itsallabouthallie
Well it has been said! You rock! plus if they do not like reading it they can go away. why does a person feel the need to tell you? so you feel bad? BAH! Keep up the great work! I am on wordpress because of you and mike!
November 13, 2007 at 5:45 pm
tia
love your show, molly.
i could say more but it’s already been said.
blog on.
November 13, 2007 at 5:52 pm
Tina Vaziri
I probably read all of those six blogs and I love each of them for their own separate characteristics. You are completely unique and you should not stop writing because of someone else’s opinion!
November 13, 2007 at 6:45 pm
s
i totally disagree. i just started reading you and such great heights recently and i have to say i love both the blogs. i don’t often comment because you always have tons and tons of comments and i think does she really want to know that i think the same things sometimes or that i totally fall out of my chair when i read the ugly shoe posts, but i should have posted these things because i know i love comments. so from a new reader and an old blogger, don’t stop writing!
my blog is private now because i got some nasty comments early on and i didn’t want to post pictures that everyone could stumble across, but i left my email address here so if you ever feel like being added just drop a line 🙂
November 13, 2007 at 8:01 pm
Top Posts « WordPress.com
[…] The ugly side of blogging Sometimes I want to throw in the towel. This blogging world? Can be mean. Recently, two of my blog friends had nasty […] […]
November 13, 2007 at 8:02 pm
onebigholiday
I completely disagree….we have not become one huge blog but we merely deal with similar issues. I really hope you choose to stay because reading your blog makes me feel better that i’m not the only person who thinks in a particular way.
🙂
November 13, 2007 at 8:13 pm
daily editor
In some ways, you and Clink do have similar blog posts. I think some of us who blog and read the same circle of blogs have adopted little habits/writing styles here and there from each other, which is probably why that person said she thinks a handful of blogs have become one and the same.
The thing is, if you put it out there for everyone to read, people will comment. Some comments will be flattering, others will be mean. In the same way people can talk about how much they like what you’re doing, they can also talk about how much they don’t like it. To me, that’s unnecessary. Blogging is not a competition, and if people use it as a way to fuel or deflate self-esteem, that’s pretty weird. Being catty died in high school; we should all be past that now.
I read your blog because I find it uplifting. You have a positive outlook on things and post about some funny stuff. And, yeah, so does Clink—but she does it differently. You’ve got your own distinct style and I think all of your regular readers would miss you if stopped posting.
November 13, 2007 at 8:40 pm
tattler
I just wanted to add my two cents. What you and Clink and others should be commended on is starting a NETWORK, or perhaps a COMMUNITY, of young women (and some men, and some not-so-youngsters) who really look up to and are inspired by you both and want to be just like you. I mean, think about that. That’s INCREDIBLE.
And, for the record, you’re so not anyone else. As much as you two have in common, I think you and Clink have completely different “blog” personalities. I started to write out exactly how you’re different (“she’s the sassy New Yorker, you’re a total sweetheart”) but it didn’t sound right. But I think you get what I’m trying to say here.
November 13, 2007 at 8:43 pm
Princess Taj
I lovey lovey lovey your blog. Screw the negative jerks – we don’t need them anyway!!!
November 13, 2007 at 10:05 pm
Alishan
It’s sounding a bit monotonous now but I love the blog. I first starting reading clinks and then came to yours and now I’m hooked on you, barbie, etc.
As I said on BB’s page earlier, you are all so much alike but all so different and that’s why I read. I can relate to you all on many levels but for different reasons. I have days when I “get” you, more than clink and vice versa. That’s what makes it great.
And if someone doesn’t have the balls to attach their name to the negativity then it’s not worth worrying about. But I can relate to the sting. It burns like hell.
Don’t leave us. The journey is getting good.
November 13, 2007 at 10:57 pm
Valerie
Um, no. End of story.
You have your own blogging style and while you happen to be sharing the same amazing life experiences as others, you are unique. So you cannot stop blogging. Ever. Well maybe some day but not in the near future.
I would be upset, as would my sister (she Loves you) and every one of your readers. This is your creative outlet and a way to share your thoughts. Don’t take it away from yourself or your readers because of someone’s negativity. Plus, it’s just not like you to quit (yes it would be quitting and could you really do that??? Sometimes I am a mom).
November 13, 2007 at 11:21 pm
libby
hey molly –
i would really (seriously) miss you if you stopped blogging. I enjoy your comments on my blog and you know I faithfully read yours. I don’t find it fair that because you’ve made friendships with other like bloggers that you should feel un-unique. Because you are your own person and if people cannot distinguish that – really, it’s their loss. Because what you say is true for every 1 bad apple there are 10 good ones.
you stand out in this crowd in the best way possible.
November 13, 2007 at 11:28 pm
cdp
The other day Benjamin dropped his Fruit Roll-Up on the kitchen floor and said, “Goddammit!” at the same time that I slammed my thumb in the door said, “Goddammit!”
My point? (Other than my five year old swears like a grumpy old man?)(And I’m a great parent because I sometimes think it’s hilarious?) We said the same thing. At the same time. And I’m fairly sure that he and I are pretty separate, whole, and DIFFERENT individuals.
I once wrote a post about secrets. Then like 50 more of us wrote secret posts. Clink writes open letters that are hilarious and now lots of us do that. I used your blog name as the title of my post one day. Like neighbors or classmates or coworkers, we pick up on the nuances of each other’s writing. It’s what makes good writers good writers. (PS? I’m sorry but yes, you and Clink are both engaged. And as your friend, I love hearing about all of it, from both of you. I’d happily read about inspiration boards and cookie buffets and dresses and Vera Wang grosgrain china on both of your blogs all the live long day. Srsly.)
You, my darling friend, are an enormously talented writer. You have a fresh perspective (even on old questions), a biting wit, and a wonderful sense of humor. To say nothing of your great taste in shoes.
I’m one of those friends you reference who had the nasty “anonymous” comment left on my blog. And I love you for this post. Even more than I did already. If you were to stop writing, it’d leave a gaping void in my days, no matter how many other engaged-girl blogs I have to read. Period.
You’re one in a million, Molls. And I love you.
November 14, 2007 at 12:39 am
midori01
Cool and honest thought on your entry here. Good for you. Not many can blog non-bull here. Heads up! Will bookmark you now:)
November 14, 2007 at 12:48 am
titus2woman
I’m glad to know I’m not the only one hurt by being unlinked! LOL! and I’m sorry that *anybody* would leave an anonymous and nasty comment. I so LOVE a healthy, respectful disagreement!
Internet relationships are so funny. They can be WAY more intimate than IRL, even though that seems weird. My darling will say, “So now you’re letting people you can’t even see or hear upset you?” LOL! Sure wish I had his attitude…. (((((HUGS))))) sandi~enjoyed finding your blog today!
November 14, 2007 at 12:50 am
びっくり
Write! Write! Write! I don’t know anything about your blog, but don’t let mean people get to you. I think you can set up filtering so anonymous posts get blocked. You can set up moderation as well, but that can be a hassle: delays and such.
Write your blog for you (and maybe your friends). If other people find it interesting, great! But don’t stop blogging.
By the way, if I were a girl I would want those red shoes too. 😉
November 14, 2007 at 12:52 am
Billy
Don’t stop! I just found this blog! I think some people take life so seriously they feel the need to make their opinions known without regard to anyone’s feelings. That sucks but this blog is great.
November 14, 2007 at 12:57 am
MeridithL
I can’t say whether you should “throw in the towel” because all of your blog entries read the same. This is the first time I’ve ever read your blog, having come across it on the WordPress home page today.
I can say that you (and your friends) can’t let the anonymous ad hominem attacks get you down. I know that’s easier said that done, but the anonymous commenters are cowards, as you point out. You can’t give them credibility by letting them get to you because they do hide behind a cloak of anonymity.
Blogging is just plain risky. A former boss of mine (I’m a professional journalist) calls blogging “journalism without the [safety] net.” I don’t mean to preach, but you do have to realize the nasty comments come with the blogging territory. Sometimes you have to address them. Sometimes you just have to ignore them. You also have to hope that your community will police itself. You know what they say, “What doesn’t kill us only makes us stronger.
Keep up the good fight!
November 14, 2007 at 12:58 am
Velvet Hammer
Rise above the creme.
November 14, 2007 at 12:58 am
tmulcahy
i don’t know, not having been reading this. I have, however, experienced the same thing with nasty comments. I only got one comment that was really good; it turned out to be someone who did offer advice (and good advice), but read enough of my other posts to be able to understand where I was coming from, and believe me, that made the entire thing worthwhile. As far as nasty comments from anonymous people, I think those are best ignored and deleted. I tried responding to an amazingly rotten comment, but the user’s email was invalid. I do believe there are a few idiots around who simply think it’s funny to click around, leaving nasty comments like bad graffiti, just for a laugh. I wonder that they were even able to navigate to a blog and and were able to figure out how to join in order to even leave a comment. Mean-spirited people are best ignored for the unintelligent, sub-human slime molds that they are.
November 14, 2007 at 12:59 am
jess
i HEART this blog times 100000000000.
don’t stop blogging!
you rock.
November 14, 2007 at 1:21 am
speedinneo
I’ll tell ya what Molly… I think that you are doing a great job on here. Don’t let what others say ever get to you. These are your thoughts and feelings. Of course, it is nice to see that others read your efforts, but that’s not what it is really all about is it?
I find that putting thoughts out there is more of a way of letting the pressure valve be open. You are never going to have everyone agree with what you write. And for those that don’t… who cares? 😀
You have as much right to say what you feel and believe in as they do. Keep up the great writing! To stop would be a loss to others.
Ehhhhh.. keep the shoes. Like words, they are an expression of yourself.
November 14, 2007 at 1:24 am
Charl
You’re kidding, right? Quit the blogosphere and deprive all of us?
For one un-linking, there’s probably 50 linkings, so you shouldn’t let it bother you. So don’t cry! It’s not worth it!
I have both you and Clink on my blogroll, which clearly implies that I recognise you two to be, you know, separate entities. You an awesome blogger, and to drive my point (and also cos I’m not sure if you know this) I’ll have you know that while signing into WordPress right now, you were the Hawt post. See? (btw, I first found your blog months ago on the wordpress homepage; hawt post again:))
Really woman, don’t you ever have an “I don’t think I should be doing this anymore” thought ever again.
November 14, 2007 at 1:51 am
Trackback, BackLink and Traffic | Berpikirlah.....
[…] The ugly side of blogging Sometimes I want to throw in the towel. This blogging world? Can be mean. Recently, two of my blog friends had nasty […] […]
November 14, 2007 at 2:01 am
Princess Pointful
I think that 70 comments gives you the sense that you aren’t boring, right?
November 14, 2007 at 10:21 am
kristin
absolutely not. i think you’re fabulous and i just started reading.
November 14, 2007 at 10:43 am
A Lil' Irish Lass
Like the 890,832,423 other people who’ve commented, I would like to request that you not head off into the blogosphere sunset. Also, I wouldn’t take the comment from your un-linker to heart. As I think has already been said above somewhere, people change. Regardless of the reason, the un-linker just stopped digging your blog…and that’s okay. It’s like any other relationship; it doesn’t mean that your blog is “no good,” it just means that it is “no good for HER, right NOW.”
As for the 5-or-6-sounding-the-same thing…I think I understand what she’s saying in that there is a distinct group of bloggers who are very clearly part of a “group” (that is not to say you “sound the same” in terms of voicing or style, but there is a clear connection, I feel). Personally, I enjoy that. When I get into work in the morning, I can’t wait to jump online and check all of your blogs and see what comments you’ve left on mine – it’s like a circle of girlfriends with whom there is an ongoing dialogue. When I am upset about something, you are the people I turn to for support and advice. I really love the fact that my “top reads” are not simply disparate blogs I’ve picked up here and there. You are part of this distinct community, yet completely individual at the same time.
A good analogue to this is the coteries of writers in early modern England (c. early 1600s – I’m flying my English major nerd flag high today). John Donne was part of a so-called coterie of writers; they wrote on many of the same topics, much of the time in conversation with one another and, sometimes, borrowing one others’ turns of phrase. While there may have been a discernible thread between the coterie writers, I don’t think any literary critic would suggest that John Donne was not a unique and fiercely individual writer.
I guess my long and rambling point is this: you can be part of this “click” of bloggers and, at the same time, remain a unique voice in the blogosphere. I think you’ve accomplished that.
The End.
November 16, 2007 at 9:47 am
End of the week musings « LittleSpoon
[…] torn between being slightly upset b/c our blog friends may confuse us (what if she’s a mean commenter?) and kind of happy b/c she chose the coolest name to be her […]
November 17, 2007 at 12:08 pm
Laurie Kendrick
You write what you want, when you want. Right now, we’re voyeurs, watching you and feeling you as you make you way down the metaphorical altar (for the time being, anyway).
If someone elects to not read you anymore, wish them well and think nothing of it. I have plenty of core readers who started with me. You;re one Molly and I loose a few and gain 50 morel
It’s all relative. I learned a long, long time ago when I worked in TV and radio, that you will NEVER please everyone all the time.
If you get 100 comments and 99 of them indicated that they are happy as hell that you grace the Earth with your presence and one wishes you Tetanus, don’t agonize over the one negative. Revel in the 99 that are good.
November 18, 2007 at 12:45 am
brandy
I’m just going to ditto everyone who left a nice comment. (and from what I’ve read, they are all pretty great). Keep doing what you are doing, it looks like you have a following!
November 19, 2007 at 4:27 pm
Jess
I know I’m way late on this one since I was out of the country and all, but I have to say that no, I don’t think anyone is blending into anyone else in the blogging world, except insofar as anyone in the real world can also be like someone else. I read your blog and many others written by people similar to you, and they are all totally separate and distinguishable in my mind because there are real, different people behind each one. The community we have here is great, and it’s awesome to find people who understand you, and it’s too bad if a few people don’t see the person behind the blog, but it’s definitely not a reason to stop blogging.
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