Howdy folks, I’m Sassafras.  Or as Molly likes to call me, Sassy Pants! 

As you know, Molly is getting married in October (yes you groan, we know!) and since Molly was such a source of support and love while I was planning my wedding, I thought I would give her and the rest of the bloggie brides out there a little counsel. 

Please note I am a minimalist.  I wear jeans and a sweater every day.  If I need to dress up I put some boots on too.  Take what you like and leave the rest.

10 Things I Learned About Being a Bride:

1.  There is no right answer.  I was always searching for what the “right” thing to do was.  It doesn’t exist.  Do what you and your future hubby feel is right for you.

2.  Everything you do the week leading up to your wedding (including day of) will take twice as long as you think it will.  I can’t explain the phenomenon, just know it’s true and plan accordingly.

3.  Wedding planning is frustrating.  I’ve never watched the Hills and know nothing of Heidi and Spencer but when I read in Us Weekly the other day that they are putting off their engagement because wedding planning was making them fight (among other things I imagine) I wasn’t surprised.  At times I wanted to elope just to make the bickering stop.  Yes, it is all worth it, just grin and bear it.

4.  Losing weight it hard.  If you’re (mostly) happy with how you look, don’t stress too much about losing weight.   About a month before my wedding I mentioned in passing to a guy friend of my (soon to be) husband’s that it didn’t look like my weight loss goals would be met and I was OK with it.  Know what he said?  “You look great – you’re active and don’t need to make yourself miserable (head nod towards his skinny girlfriend) and a bitch towards everyone else.” Enjoying life, including eating and drinking with my friends was much more important to me.

5.  If you can, make the family happy.  Stick to your guns on things that are important to you but if you can make grandma happy simply by doing something small, do it. 

6.  Seriously consider doing pictures beforehand if your ceremony & reception will be in the same place.  I know it is different for everyone but after the ceremony we wanted to mingle with our guests…we didn’t want to pose for pictures. 

7.  Don’t let the “Bridal Industry” brainwash you into thinking you need to have this and that.  By all means if you want to have it all, go for it.  I’m a minimalist and couldn’t imagine spending a ridiculous amount of money on something for one day.  We used toasting glasses that we were given as an engagement gift and a cake knife that my husband’s parents used.  I didn’t have special underwear for the day of and I didn’t spend money on beautifying myself months prior because I didn’t need to.  It is easy to get caught up in what other ultra-brides are doing.  Do what you want and nothing more.

8.  If you can’t go on a honeymoon after the wedding don’t sweat it.  Hubby and I couldn’t and I am glad now that we didn’t.  It would have been too much stress for me to worry about packing and traveling.  We enjoyed nursing our hangovers (OK, fine it was me), opening our gifts and relaxing on the couch.  We’re looking forward to celebrating our honeymoon in April – 6 months after we got married.

9.  Things will go wrong.  Know that going in and you will be fine.

10.  The greatest compliment we received was from our friends who were finishing up their whirlwind 2007 wedding tour with our wedding.  They enjoyed our wedding because it was us.  Everything about it was what we wanted, what we felt comfortable with and as a result we had an amazing day.  In every picture we are grinning ear to ear.  THAT is what it should be all about.

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