If you look at a picture of my bridesmaids, you’ll see a pretty even line between them. Aside from my sister, three were friends from college and three were friends from childhood. A perfect balance of silver and gold.

I of course treasure all my friendships, but there’s something about the ones that have lasted 20 plus years that really make me stop and think. These women have known me through basically every milestone since potty training. (One was probably potty training in the same room with me, actually.) They know why I am who I am, how my family and life experiences have shaped my future.

We all change as we get older, and many of the friendships of childhood are no longer. Even the ones from high school that I thought would be there forever. Which is why I’ve been struggling after an argument I had this weekend with one of those lifelong friends. It was brief, it was mostly through text messaging, but it cut to the core.

The details of the argument aren’t important, but it kept me up at night wondering how the words could hurt so much. In the end, I figured out it was because this woman knows me inside and out. Knows my soul and knew exactly what to say to throw me into full guilt mode.

It sucked.

We talked yesterday and while nothing was exactly resolved, the problem was brushed under the rug and moved away from. We even transitioned right back into normal conversation.

But I’m still thinking about it. And it’s still bothering me.

So value your friendships, OK? And be careful with those you love. Especially the super sensitive ones, like me.