December 31, 2009

Dear Baby,

Today is my 27th birthday and the last day of 2009. Tonight, your Daddy and I will ring in the new year together with a pizza and a bottle of sparkling cider and celebrate the beginning of  2010 — the year you will be born.

Did you hear that? The year you’re going to be BORN! I can’t tell you how excited that makes me. In a little while I will be heading off to my monthly doctor’s appointment, where I will get to listen to your heartbeat again. I can’t think of a better birthday present than that.

Last night at midnight, Daddy pulled me into a hug and wished me a happy birthday. Then he put his hands on my belly and told you he loved you. You are so lucky, Baby, to be coming into a family filled with love. It will be my mission to make you feel as loved as I do every day of your life. I don’t think that will be hard, since you’re already loved so much.

We don’t have any big plans tonight, just us, home, together. There’s supposed to be some freezing rain anyway, and who wants to be on the road with that?

Sixteen years from today you’re going to ask me if you can go to a party tonight and I will tell you no. You will probably be mad at me and roll your eyes. You’ll tell me I’m so uncool. And I will tell you exactly what your grandmother told me every year — you are my baby and I love you too much for anything to happen to you. New Years Eve is not  a safe night to be out. Not until you’re at least 18 and then only if I know where you are at all times and you’re not drinking or getting in a car.

That won’t appease you, but I’m your mother so what I say goes.

I finally really understand what my mother meant, Baby. Because you’re not even here yet and I would give my life to keep you safe.

I will show you this letter someday and hope that you understand.

Twenty-seven is the best birthday by far, I think, because of you. You are exactly 14-weeks old in there and in just 4-6 weeks we will find out if you’re a boy or a girl. That seems like an eternity, but it was just that long ago that we heard your heartbeat for the first time and that feels like just yesterday.

That perfect little heartbeat.

I love you, my little Baby. And I’m so happy that 2010 is going to be your year.

See you in six months!