Long time readers probably remember how I used to write about my struggles with Michael’s mom. I don’t write about that anymore — mostly to respect family privacy — but also, because slowly, very slowly, things are starting to change.

I am not a mother of a son so I cannot fully understand the relationship they have. But I get it. I get the protective, no woman is good enough for my son, vibe. I bet if you ask 98% of married women how they get along with their mother-in-laws, they’ll laugh in your face.

When we were dating, every interaction with his mom was uncomfortable. Dinners dragged on for what felt like hours and I was constantly feeling under the microscope. I would wish for summer, if only to have his grandmother back as a buffer.

And I began to think that this was how it was always going to be. Me against her.

After we got engaged, I think the tables started to turn for her. Maybe she realized I was really here to stay. Maybe she started looking at me as an adult and not just her son’s girlfriend. Or maybe she just decided to make an effort. Whatever the reason, our relationship has changed.

For the better.

We had dinner at her house last night and for the first time it really felt like the ice was melting. She made a huge batch of tabouleh just so I could take home leftovers because she knows how much I love it. The evening flowed smoothly with no uncomfortable conversations. For the first time in almost 7 years, I felt like she was family.

I made a comment to Michael about it on the way home and he too had noticed a change. And later, as I lay awake till 2 a.m., the usually wedding lists keeping me awake, I started to think about our rehearsal dinner. It’s at this dinner that I plan to thank the people most important to me. The people that have made this wedding possible, the ones that share our happiness.

This time, I really thought about what I would say to her. My future mother-in-law.

We will always have our differences, this I am sure. We will have ups. We will have downs. We will disagree, argue and make up again.

But a new wind is blowing and I can feel it.

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